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Successful relationships are the foundation of a productive fulfilling life that has profound and positive impact on the family, the organization and the society.

At Maximum Impact Training, we deliver a unique innovative set of programs that are specifically tailored and customized to address key issues that are the foundation of a successful long-term relation and commitment. Our programs are experiential and packed with the leading content world-wide and reflection exercises to assist in exploring areas to develop. These programs provide a couple with the skills and tools they need to acquire a richer ,  more enjoyable and purposeful future. We unlock a couple’s potential by challenging them mentally, physically and emotionally. Our programs are executed at a special facility tailored to this program and led by speakers of the highest quality.



Why do the course?

 

   •    Regular check-ups help a car run smoothly and reduce the risk of breakdown.

   •    The best sports professionals spend hours being coached and perfecting their technique.

   •    The greatest achievements in life take practice,training and dedication.

It is the same with marriage. A strong, loving and lifelong relationship doesn’t happen by chance. It takes effort and dedication to keep the fun and romance alive. We can all learn how to make even the happiest marriage better.

 


Does Love really have 5 languages?
How much is Communication important to you?
Do you have Common Values with your partner?


Mostcouples spend countless hours preparing for the wedding, but little, if anytime preparing for married life. 

 

TheMarriage Preparation Course can help you develop strong foundations for alasting marriage.

Why do thecourse?

If you’re like most people you prepare and plan formany things in life: education, career, retirement and holidays. And mostcouples spend up to 250 hours planning their wedding, but very little time, ifany, planning for married life. There are many things you can do to beginbuilding a lifelong, happy marriage. Investing in your relationship before youare married will reap rewards for many years to come.







MIT Advanced Parenting Course

Main Topics:

- Developing Emotional Health
-
Helping Them Make Good Choices

Course Dates: 16th May, From 10 – 1pm

Cost per person: 400 L.E


MIT Teenagers Parenting Course

Main Topics:

-Keeping the end in mind                         

- Meeting our Teenagers' Needs                     

- Setting Boundaries                                                 

- Developing Emotional Health

- Helping Them Make Good Choices

Course Dates: 9th&16th May, From 10 – 1pm

Cost per person: 900L.E

Location: BISC School Beverly Hills, 6 October.

Deadline: for registration: 5th of May

For Booking call + 201222101300 or email us on office@mitegypt.com

http://www.relationshipcentral.org/resource/parenting-children-course-promo

Why do the course?

   •    Children do not arrive with an instruction manual

   •    No role we undertake is more important than parenting

Family life is under great pressure today and parentsface bewildering choices about how to parent effectively. Discovering we arenot alone in the challenges we face and picking up ideas from other parents canmake a huge difference. We can all learn how to make even the happiest familybetter.

What is The Parenting Children Course?

The ParentingChildren Course is for any parents, step-parents, prospective parents or carersof children aged 0 – 10 years. Because Children are a real gift, we need tolove them, learn them, lead them and leave them when they reach the right age !We will speak of the 4Ls !

 

As parents we can say things to our children thatwill affect how they think about themselves for the rest of their lives.



Anewspaper article about the actress Dawn French included this description ofher upbringing:

WhenDawn French was fourteen years old, overweight and about to go to her firstdisco, her late father sat her down for a talk. She was expecting the usualfather/daughter stuff about boys with high testosterone levels and what timeshe should be home.

He did spell out what he would doto any over-enthusiastic lad who dared lay a finger on the young Dawn. But itwas what he said next that had such a lasting effect on her life.
He told her that she was uncommonly beautiful, the most precious thing in hislife, that he prized her above everything and was proud to be her father.

Nofather could have given his daughter a more valuable start in life. Instead ofapproaching adolescence as the short, fat girl, who couldn’t get a boyfriend,Dawn was secure in the knowledge that she was loved for who she was, not forwhat she looked like.

That confidence has remainedthroughout her adult life. And, yes, she is uncommonly beautiful. It is a soft,warm beauty enhanced by a ready, generous smile.

‘Howwise of my father to say that,’ she reflects. ‘It affected my whole life. Howcould you not come out of it well-equipped to deal with life, when you felt soloved and supported?’

Ourwords also have the power to crush. A friend of ours played the piano as achild until one day her grandmother said to her, ‘What an awful noise! You’llnever learn to play well.’ So she stopped permanently.

Theway we talk to our children can become a habit – for good or bad. We can easilybecome fixated on our child’s failures, mediocrity or irritating behaviour.

We go on… and on… and on aboutthese, instead of seeing his uniqueness and good points. In fact, suchcriticism may well spring from our own problems – from what is going on insideus.
We are feeling stressed. We are feeling inadequate. We are desperate for othersto be impressed by our children. But if we only speak negative, critical wordsto them, they will grow up feeling insecure.

Thepsychologist Professor John Gottman asserts that, for every one criticalcomment from their parents, children need at least five positive comments.

Onemother, with two children under five, said to us, ‘The hour before bedtime isthe hardest time to remain positive.

Thehouse looks like a bomb site, the children are tired and petulant, the choresseem endless, I feel a wreck, and to top it all we have some people arrivingfor supper at eight o’clock!

It’sso easy to be sharp and to say: “Why on earth can’t you undress more quickly?”or, “I’ve had enough of your messing around – you’re hopeless,” and other suchcomments which I regret later when I look at their little faces all snuggled upand sleeping peacefully. ‘It took me two years to realise that, if I startedbedtime routines half an hour earlier, I would be less hassled and would end upbeing less critical.’

Wewill look at four ways we can use words positively to keep filling up ourchildren’s emotional tank to ensure they feel loved.

1. Words of affection

Expressing our love

The three words ‘I love you’ havegreat power. John, now in his twenties, said, ‘I cannot remember ever hearingmy parents say that, or any other affectionate words to me throughout mychildhood. It left me feeling very alone and insecure.’ He is still waiting tohear those three words.
Parents need to speak frequently of their love from the earliest months oftheir children’s lives all the way through the teenage years.

Thewords, ‘I love you,’ might be part of the bedtime ritual when they are youngeror the last words spoken to older children before they leave for school. Theymight be sent by text or written in a letter for a child to keep and read overagain.
Teenagers long to hear their parents speak these three words to them more thantheir parents usually realise.

As they pass through adolescencethey are besieged by questions about their identity and value. They areundermined by their own unfavourable comparisons with their friends andsiblings.
But hearing they are loved can help provide the security and self-worth theyneed to carry them through.

Phraseslike, ‘I love being with you,’ ‘I love playing with you,’ ‘I really enjoytalking to you,’ ‘I like watching you draw/seeing you play hockey/watching theway you play with your little brother,’ ‘You’re wonderful,’ ‘You’re so funny,’‘You’re great fun,’ should become part of our regular vocabulary to express ouraffection.

Saying what is best for our child

It isimportant that we say these words of affection for our child’s sake, not ours,as otherwise they can be used to manipulate. ‘I love you. Do you love me?’ ismore about meeting a parent’s emotional needs than the child’s.

Afriend said to us, ‘I know my dad loved me, but he only ever said the words, “Ilove you,” when I was supporting him through a crisis. It felt conditional. Themore worthy deeds I did, the more I felt his approval.’

We mayhave to think about what will be of most comfort to a young child in the momentof being separated from us.

Tosay, ‘I love you,’ when we are prising her off our shoulder to put her intoschool could make separation harder. Equally to shout, ‘I love you,’ to aneight-year-old from the touchline is likely to be counterproductive. A timelywink might mean the same thing and not be embarrassing.

Learning to express affection

Someparents find it difficult to express their love in words, particularly if,during their upbringing they did not hear affectionate words being spoken intheir family.

Thebook, Guess how much I love you can provide a springboard for parents of littlechildren to start to articulate their thoughts.2 Breaking the sound barrier isusually the hardest part. Once we become used to hearing ourselves speakingaffectionately, we will find it gets easier and easier.

2. Words of comfort

Oneseventeen-year-old boy was asked how he knew his parents loved him when he wasa young child. He said: ‘They told me they loved me, allowed me to sleep intheir bedroom when I was scared and comforted me. I remember Dad always said,“It’s all right,” when I cried or had a nightmare.’

There will be moments in ourchildren’s lives when they are frightened, worried, confused or do notunderstand what is happening to them.

At such times our words canreassure and comfort them at a deep level. What we say is likely to stick intheir memory and be a help to them years later when they are lonely or worried.

3. Words of praise

Looking out for opportunities

SteveChalke, author of How to Succeed as a Parent, writes, ‘The golden rule is this:catch your kids red-handed doing something right and praise them for it.’

A friendof ours who teaches children aged six to eleven commented, ‘As any primaryschool teacher will tell you, praise is the only sustainable strategy formanaging behaviour and encouraging hard work in a class of thirty children.’

In afamily with more than one child, praising the child who is behaving well,rather than telling off the one who is misbehaving, is a powerful means ofencouraging good behaviour, particularly if the misbehaviour might beattention-seeking.

Carefully chosen words of praisedo much to build the relationship between parent and child. We have somefriends with two sons, both mad keen on football.

Having played football himself,the father watches every move of their weekend games with avid interest. If oneof them loses a match badly and comes home in the evening discouraged, thefather tells him what a brilliant tackle he did five minutes into the secondhalf.

Theboy’s mood begins to change and father and son then spend the next ten minutesto an hour happily analysing the whole game.

It isworth considering whether we are praising our children equally. A friend ofours with an older brother felt that his brother got eighty per cent of hisparents’ praise. This was very hurtful.

Praising a child’s character

Tocounterbalance our celebrity culture, which defines success in terms of looks,fame or income, it is important to look out for the positive qualities of eachchild’s character.
In doing so, we encourage the values we care about most. We might praise themfor their generosity in sharing their possessions; for playing nicely with afriend; for looking after a sibling; or for their ability to cope in adifficult situation.
One mother noticed how good her six-year-old son was at making friends withlonely children in the playground.

She commended him and then askedhim why he did it. He replied, ‘They need my help.’ Her praise reinforced hiskindness. Not only will our children thrive on this sort of encouragement, butthey will take on the role of being encouragers themselves.

Praising achievements

Ouraim is to commend our children more often than we criticise them.
One father told us, ‘I take our oldest child to school in the morning on theback of my scooter and every day I try to tell her one thing she is good at.’

Butwhat if our children do not seem to excel in any arena? They are not athletic;they struggle with school work; and they have neither musical nor dramaticgifts.
In this case our words of praise will be even more important as our child isunlikely to be hearing them elsewhere. That does not mean using false flattery.That will make our children trust our words less.

We must be honest in our praise.

We need to look for thoseachievements that no one else will notice. For younger children this might meancongratulating them for dressing themselves: ‘That was really clever puttingyour shirt on this morning, Tom,’ even if some of the other clothes are on backto front.
We can encourage them as we watch them forming the letters of their name: ‘Youwrote those letters so carefully,’ even if they are several months behind theirpeers.
We can congratulate them for brushing their teeth or tidying their bedroom,even if we have just asked them to do it.

Or we might be able to say, ‘Thatwas really generous of you to share your new toy with John.’
To an older child, we might say: ‘Well done! You are really persisting withyour maths,’ even if the rest of their school work leaves a lot to be desired.

‘Thank you for not slamming thedoor when you left this morning,’ particularly if we talked to them about itthe day before. ‘You were a real help at lunch today.’

‘Thank you so much for stayingand chatting to Grandpa – he really enjoyed it.’ ‘Well done for helping toclear up the garden.’ Or, as part of a conversation over a meal, ‘These muffinsare delicious,’ if our child baked them.

These attempts at encourage-mentmay at first sound contrived or insincere to our ears; but as we practisepraising our children, they will become more and more natural.

4. Words of affirmation

Showing our pride

Our children may be teased,bullied, come bottom of the class, face disappointment and occasionally evenwonder if they are worth anything to anybody. As parents we are in the bestposition to convince them that they are full of potential and have a uniquecontribution to make.
We can assure them that we believe in them and value them.

During the final of thetelevision competition, Pop Idol, the mother of Will Young was interviewed.‘You must be so proud of him tonight,’ said the reporter. ‘Oh! I was proud ofhim a long time before tonight,’ she replied. ‘He doesn’t have to sing to makeme proud of him.’
Some of us are hugely ambitious for our children. We are determined to helpthem overcome their flaws and improve their performance.

The result is that we focus ontheir weaknesses more than on their strengths. This is short-sighted. Childrenwho are confident of their parents’ love have a secure base upon which to buildtheir future.

Talking in their hearing

Speaking about our children infront of them will affect how they think about themselves.
‘She’s a complete nightmare.’ ‘I am finding it so tedious being at home withhim.’ ‘She’s so naughty!’ ‘He drives me up the wall! I’ll tell you what he didthe other day…’

We have all heard parents talkingdisparagingly in their children’s hearing. They forget that their children areabsorbing every word.

A child may not react outwardly,especially when very young, but will take on board all that is said.

Conversely, when a parent tells agrandparent or a godparent in the child’s hearing a story about their child’skindness or thought-fulness (avoid telling friends, as parents who show off aretiresome), it makes her feel valued.

We may hold back from praisingour children for fear of spoiling them. But children are not spoilt throughpraise, but through a lack of discipline and through being allowed to dowhatever they like.

Affirming their looks

Affirming our children’s physicalappearance from birth helps them to stop comparing themselves unfavourably withothers, particularly during their teenage years.
One woman told us how her mother would say to her every time she brushed herred hair, ‘What beautiful hair you have! What beautiful hair!’ Despite alwaysstanding out from others, she never doubted as she grew up that the colour ofher hair was an asset to her.
In affirming their looks, we are helping them to distinguish between what theycan change and what they cannot.

So we might well encouragechildren to wash their hair, or provide a diet that will help  them  stay in shape,  or ensure  they are  getting  enough  exercise, whilst recognising that differentchildren have a different build and we are not expecting them to look like asupermodel.
Our aim is to help them to look their best while being confident in the naturalshape of their own body.

In aculture obsessed with physical looks, focusing too much on their appearancewill be unhelpful to them. Our aim is to assure them that we love them for whothey are, with their own unique attributes.

RobParsons writes, ‘The other day, my wife Dianne complimented a teenager on hernew outfit. The girl smiled, but her mother poked a finger at her tummy andsaid,
“It’ll look even better when she does something about that.” Of course a parentwill want to help a child who is seriously overweight or has a bad attack ofacne, but somehow at the same time, we have to let our children know that welove them anyway.

Thatinvolves us being manifestly proud of them when they are at their gawkiest, andespecially if their features don’t happen to fit in with what society atpresent considers “attractive.”’

Conclusion

Wordsof affection, comfort, praise and affirmation make a deep and life-changingimpact on our children. They need us to tell them how much we love them, notonly when they please us but also when they least expect it.

Speaking like this requiresunselfishness on our part. We have to put aside our        own  agenda,  our tiredness,  our frustration  with  the messy  bedroom,  our disappointment at the terrible report.
in order to take the time to think of something kind and positive to say. Wewill have to bite our tongue at times; but we will be astonished at thedifference that a little encouragement can make to our child. Speaking this languageof love will fill up the emotional tank inside.

Pause and consider

·        Trycounting the number of positive and negative comments you make to your childrentoday. Is the ratio at least 5:1 (positive to negative)?

·        Whattype of loving, encouraging words do you find the hardest to say?

·        Areyou aware of any pattern of critical words you want to change?

·        Thinkof three characteristics or attributes in each of your children that you wouldlike to affirm this week.

Establishing healthy routines

Sittingaround a table on a regular basis is one of the most beneficial activities forchildren. This may be the only time a family is together.

Eatingtogether at least once a day has been part of family life in almost everyculture, until the second half of the twentieth century in the West.

Longer working hours have meantone or both parents may not be at home to eat with their children during theweek.

With the advent of the TV,families began to sit passively in a semi-circle, being entertained rather thanattempting to make conversation with each other.

Fastfood and microwaves mean family members can eat separately at different times.
Now in the UK, with eighty per cent of children aged five to sixteen having aTV in their own room, arguing about which channel to watch is a thing of thepast.

Homes today are being builtwithout a space for a family dining table. But healthy family life thrives oneating together.

Children learn (eventually!) toeat what is put in front of them, rather than each choosing their own food, andare more likely to have a balanced diet. They learn table manners.
When they are old enough, they are expected to take a share in the preparationand the clearing up.

All of these routines, reinforcedday by day, teach them that they are part of a family; that they are a valuedmember, but not the centre; that their views will be heard, just as they areexpected to listen to others; that they have a contribution to make, and sodoes everyone else.
Of course children will grumble, refuse to eat the food, or throw it on thefloor. They will forget to say thank you, or seem incapable of staying on theirchair for more than thirty seconds – in some cases, well into their teenageyears!

We may feel we have reminded themevery day for years to offer the tomato ketchup before helping themselves, andthey still forget.

Mealtimescan be a battleground and sometimes we feel as if we are losing the war. Butthey are a vital, regular social activity that prepares children for just aboutevery other type of social activity.

Weneglect family meals at the risk of failing to socialise our childreneffectively. And, if we persevere, eventually we will see the benefits ofeating regularly together.

For some families, the weekendsare the only time for regular family meals.

One father we know, who could notbe home early enough during the week to eat with the children, made lunch atthe weekend fun by initiating games at the table, such as challenging eachfamily member to talk on a favourite topic for one minute without hesitation orrepetition.
With a sullen teenager, encouraging conversation might involve asking eachperson to describe their best and worst moments of the day or week.

The chef and restaurateur,Raymond Blanc, wrote of the value of family mealtimes in a newspaper article,called ‘Let’s eat en famille!’:

Tocook for family and friends is an act of love that binds together all who shareit. But in Britain, we are cooking and eating together less – and thisfrightens me.
A family that eats together is more likely to be a kind, close family whosechildren will grow up to be kind and considerate …

Butthe child, who grows up knowing nothing of these mealtime disciplines, willgrow up respecting neither good food nor other people, and will almostcertainly have limited communication skills.

The strange mystery of my list of rules

Nicky:When our children were all under eleven, I bought a new computer. I decided Iwould do an A4 page of rules for our home.

I wasso pleased with my handiwork that I not only included well-recognisedboundaries for the children’s behaviour, but I found myself adding a number ofnew ones that I knew would make the household work like clockwork from then on.Mealtimes would be transformed with punctual and well-dressed children; argumentsabout bedtimes would be a thing of the past; bedrooms would be ready forinspection by any unexpected visitor.

Ipresented this impressive list at the next family meal and carefully took themthrough the various points. I was, I confess, a little disappointed by theircool response. I had expected to be congratulated for the presentation and forthe clarification of the house rules. I put the silence down to thoughtfulness.

Iannounced that the list would be pinned inside the cupboard at the top of thestairs for easy reference (I did not want to embarrass anyone by displaying itpublicly) and I put it up that evening.

A weeklater I had some reason to go to the cupboard. Not a sign of my list remained.I do not know to this day whether it was one child or all four working togetherwho quietly removed it. I also came to see that children do not respond well tolists of rules, however well presented.